“by(e)gone” by Celine Shaji

Ammachi

A letter to my grandmother

You first had me in your hands

And said a familiar hello

Made my favorite snacks

And asked me why my heart felt so blue

A call to my mother

Took me to school and packed my lunch

Tied my shoelaces and helped me with school

Bought me new clothes when I grew taller and taller

Gave me hugs when I felt so blue

A text to my sister

How was school?

How was work?

Our company was more than enough

To help me with my blues

Ammachi

Ammachi

My future in three syllables

My future in three women

Am ma chi

Radio Mango

When I went back to my grandparents’ house

In search of a trace of me

It had aged so much

Youth now alien to me

I could feel that time had passed

When the corridors became smaller

While I grew taller

And all I could find was a dustry stroller

I can’t go back to my youth, or

To what this house was for me

I can’t just hit pause

For what this house used to be

Which makes youth

So much more lovely

It shines just for a minute

Just for me

Celine Shaji (she/her) is an Architecture student at the University of Michigan. Apart from architecture, she is also interested in pursuing a minor in UX design. She is inspired by how architecture can be used as a form of storytelling and loves to listen to music and journal in her free time.

Artist’s Statement: “‘Ammachi’ was written as a form of appreciation for the women figures in my life. Ammachi means grandmother in Malayalam. Each syllable represents a different figure: am for ammachi, ma for my mother and chi for chechi which means older sister.

In ‘Radio Mango,’ I look back at my childhood days spent in my grandparents’ house and the fleeting nature of my past, present and my future. The title, Radio Mango, pays homage to the most popular radio station in Kerala where I grew up.”